Montag, 15. April 2013

350 | Beliefs & Self-Definitions in relation to „My Life“

ART by Kelly Posey

Continuing from
Day 349 | Self Commitment - Responsibility for „My Life“ & Responsibility for Life as a Whole
Day 348 | Self Commitment - "My Life"
Day 347 | Self Commitment & Desteni I Process 

…If I look at the aspects of my life that apparently define and determine the possibilities and opportunities that I have in “my life” and within this also the ‘value’ I have been attributed to “my life”/myself, I can see that there are still beliefs and self-definitions within me/my mind through which I am limiting myself and keeping myself from expanding, expressing and moving myself toward LIVING to the utmost of my potential.
…I will be looking into such beliefs and self-definitions in self-honesty, to deconstruct them through self-forgiveness and reconstruct the points into solutions by scripting the self-corrective living that I see is required to be walked/lived in order to place the self-realization into practical application and in fact CHANGE.

Looking back, the most prominent experience I have had throughout my life was that of ‘not fitting in’ – which is also why I named this Blog “A Misfit’s Journey to Life”.
Interestingly enough there are some polarity aspects to the word/definition of “Misfit”, which I would like to elaborate on:

On the one hand, there are many people existing as misfits in this world, due to the nature of the world system, where the conditions and circumstances one is born into determine who one can be and what opportunities one will have in life. Being born into war, hunger, starvation, discrimination – leaves its mark on a child already in the formative years.

On the other hand, many people feel like misfits or define themselves as such, even though they exist in conditions that are not as severe as for instance hunger, starvation, poverty, famine. Defining oneself as a ‘misfit’ and sticking to it, without making the effort to examine the implications as well as the motives for such self-definition, has consequences.

For instance, what I can say when I look back at my life and how I have lived my life based on such self-definition, is the following:

For a long time I considered myself ‘superior’ to the people that were able to easily integrate themselves within the system, I considered those people to be merely sheep while I considered myself to be ‘something better’. It is easy to see the arrogance within this, especially since for a long time I had not asked myself what it is the shapes the human, what it is that forms what we call ‘human nature’.

When I came across Desteni and started asking myself the ‘difficult questions’ as well as questioning the system in its entirety and investigating how the things that we perceive and accept as ‘normal’ come to be, I realized that I there had in fact existed a suppressed feeling of ‘inferiority’ within me, because actually there was a time where I did want and wish to be ‘normal’, to be just like everyone else, to ‘fit in’, to not have to feel ‘different’ or the ‘odd one out’. 

In an attempt to compensate for such experiences – instead of examining the experience of ‘inferiority’ in self-honesty – I had attempted to make myself ‘more’, and so I suppressed and denied that experience within myself, and created all kinds of beliefs about people, society, the world, and myself, making myself feel ‘superior’ in my mind and finding ways to exist that made me ‘feel better’ about myself. One such ‘way’ was the spiritual path. (If you want to read more about how I dealt with spirituality, do a search on my Blog.)

…to be continued

Suggested Reading:
Karma and Spiritual Compassion

ART by Marlen Vargas Del Razo

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