Sonntag, 11. Mai 2014

Day 512 | Redefining the word Expectations

So, looking at ‘my expectations’, I realized that my expectations, even the relevant ones, are always some idealized ideas and I remembered what once Sunette told me on the farm, quite in the beginning – that I was walking my day in a way as if I at the beginning of the day would project myself into some idea/ideal of who I am supposed to be /how the day is supposed to be - and then constantly being in the 'reach-out', like projected 'out there'.
So instead of living the relevant expectations - I had used the point of value as in the word ‘enough’ to sabotage myself and keep myself small, while I could keep on 'dreaming'/'imagining' the 'perfection or perfect conditions'.
Which now reminds me of something Bernard once said to me - "it's about who you are when things are NOT perfect..."
Also - within walking and deconstructing the word ‘enough’, I can see once again how the solution is always multiple times simpler than the problem - like here with my definitions of the word ‘enough’ as 'problem' in my mind, and the actual definition of the word’s expression as the 'solution' in the physical: where I can say “this is enough! I now direct and change this!”

So what I have found is that, okay, all my expectations are mental projections and exist in the context of ‘perfection’ –
and in working with the word ‘ENOUGH’ I diffused the polarity (where ‘perfection’ is the positive-polarity of ‘not being enough’, all in the light of validation and a ‘value’ separate from self-worth as life) –
so all my expectations are mental projections and exist in the context of ‘perfection’ – but I can transform that which was merely a positive projection into practical positive change.

I realize and understand that perfection is a process, and that I am able to practically live a process of self-perfection through self-commitment in the simplest moments in my everyday life, in all aspects of my life in fact. This perfection process is an equal and one process, there is no projected positivity or comparison to some superior ideal; it is simply the understanding of what it will take to create/manifest/experience/live that which one wants to live/develop/manifest as real value, and then realizing one can only walk this self-perfection process breath by breath – taking responsibility for one breath at a time, one point at a time. It is possible to live and walk in real-time. We are still far from that.

So – looking at what the word Expectations practically/physically express – I mean in common sense how can you practically expect something that you didn’t create/initiate? – I see that I require to effectively re-assess/structure my expectations based on and aligned with what physically exists and what is physically possible in my physical reality/world as well as who I am and what my abilities and qualifications are currently.
In other words, I can expect that which I am already busy creating/initiating/manifesting – or just accepting and allowing in ignorance and unawareness.
I realize thus that Expectations in practical common sense should be aligned with the projected accumulation of that which I am busy living and manifesting – in every moment, with every breath.
And things take time in physical reality, thus it is to not have expectations as mental projections ‘out there’ to mentally and emotionally distract me from being here in every moment!

So here, I redefine the words ‘my expectations’ from being an inflated/superior projection of myself ‘out there’ in separation from Me Here whereby I within that in fact implied that Me Here is ‘less than’/inferior – to simply be the projected result of that which I have committed myself to live/accumulate in the various aspects of my life and living.

Therefore, my expectations should equal the calculated consequences as cause & effect, whereby I am the directive principle.

The word/expression of ‘My Expectations’ thus also entails Self-Responsibility.

It is because I can see the accumulation/result/consequences of my participation in my world/reality that I realize: I have/I place these particular expectations upon myself/upon these particular aspects of my life because I take responsibility for myself/for these particular points.

I therefore realize that I am responsible for each and every point that I am faced-with throughout my life; and that in the context of LIFE as Value I require to be response-able in every moment as I live and participate in my world/reality. It doesn’t mean I have to say ‘yes’ to everything that crosses my way but it does mean to in any case make a directive decision and make a stand = determine who I am in the context of that moment/point/situation. Because that moment is about to have an effect on myself as well as has an effect on another’s life. Will I subject myself and others/another to ‘coincidence’, to preprogrammed patterns? Or will I make a decision as to who I am as in how I stand in relation to the moment/point and how I will direct myself and thus the context too into a best outcome that is supportive of LIFE in that it allows for communication, for expansion, for potential, for growth and real self expression.

This brings us back to the point of Self Responsibility – Next post to follow.

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Day 511 | Relationships & Expectations

I noticed that in the last couple of days I’ve been taking a look at my cellphone and thinking there may be a message from him.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to EXPECT a message or phone call from him – or also thinking that surely he will soon be contacting me – and that I haven’t within that realized that what I’m doing is expecting him to give direction as to ‘the next step’ to be taken in the context of that particular relationship.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to postpone directing the point within myself and coming to a decision, which -if I would- would manifest a self experience wherein I am no longer in a state of waiting, thinking and believing or even hoping that when/once he calls/talks to me things will change/be directed.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to expect change from others while abdicating my self-responsibility for change.
Therefore I commit myself to take self responsibility here and look at what I have created of and as ‘him’ within my mind; what I have created of and as ‘the relationship’ within my mind; as well as what I have created as myself in the context of this particular relationship.
And I can see that none of that is supportive because my starting-point has been a form of validation as in acceptance or love or caring – but in essence of Responsibility because I wasn’t taking the responsibility to give to myself acceptance, love, caring, within living self-acceptance, self-love, and caring for myself.

I find the best way to look at a relationship or a point is to look at it DIRECT, blunt, to see it for what it is. Instead of ‘thinking about it’ as in having it recycle within my mind only, over and over again the same thoughts, pictures, judgments, emotional experiences, ending-up ‘feeling overwhelmed’ in the spinning of this system/construct instead of LOOKING and directing the points in practical common sense.

So let me then get to this practical common sense and let me look at this bluntly. In this relationship we have ended up not being able to effectively communicate and work together. I have accepted and allowed myself to spin the relationship within my mind based on my own ‘wants, needs, and desires’ which I deemed ‘my right’ and those ‘wants, needs, and desires’ have been in effect nothing but my EXPECTATION that another must be responsible for what I am experiencing, thus it was simply a point of self-abdication.
So here I had looked into how I had defined relationship and partnership to be something that will be savior. Or where I could be the savior. Where there was always a giving and taking that was binding the two together, and the two must be for each other and beyond that the rest is irrelevant. Because this is ‘the one’ that will make everything possible…or ‘the one’ that will unleash my true potential…

So I had abdicated my dreams and made of them expectations, but I was not giving it to myself, I was waiting for it to happen, to come to me, to be given, “because the universe loves you” or because someone really cares. And then projecting my expectation of potential unfolding into relationships, thus almost living under the belief that if I have no relationship, if I have no one to love me and care for me and be here for me, I cannot expand and reach my full potential. I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed equations of limitation within myself, equations that devalue my will and my power and abdicate my Response-Ability to something/someone ‘out there’.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to wait for something else / someone else to make Me ‘more’/’better’/’fulfilled’ and that I’ve abdicated my self-directive authority to projections of myself in separation from Who I Am Here in every moment, wherein I’ve defined myself somehow as ‘not enough’ and instead of looking at this practically pragmatically and assisting and supporting myself to expand, develop, and grow, I have accepted that self-belief as ‘not being enough’ and have projected expectations of ‘being enough’ /being ‘more’ out there for Me to ‘reach’/’gain’/’attain’, separating myself from the ability to create and manifest that which I want to live, experience and express.

In previous blog posts I have worked with the word ‘enough’ and have seen/realized that actual physical expression of the word enough as in Stop, I am Full. 
And therefore I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to live the word Enough as in making the absolute decision that I have had enough of self-destruction, enough of self-sabotage, enough of self-judgment, and that I will no longer accept or allow myself to go into self-pity or regret in a gesture of giving up and devaluing myself/my life.
And within this I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to want/need/desire ‘something more’ in order for me to ‘feel’ valuable, to ‘feel’ worthy, to ‘feel’ that I am ‘enough’- and to in relationships EXPECT that this ‘something more’ will be given to me.
Within this I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to entertain relationships through HOPE: hoping and waiting for my expectations to ‘come true’, for my wants/needs/desires to be ‘fulfilled’- and if you’ve come thus far then you’ll already be asking yourself as I am: How can real fulfillment ever manifest within such context of self separation?

In light of all this, I come back to the point of Self-Responsibility and I see that Self-Responsibility is the Key to ending self separation.

More on this in the next blog posts.

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Day 510 | ‘Stand Alone’ & ‘Other People‘

A memory of an experience I’ve been having with people popped-up today, and that was about how I’d usually hold-back and expect the others to approach me or to invite me, waiting for the others to take initiative, as if thinking to myself: I don’t know how to be.
I had often looked at this behavior of mine and I did work on changing it in terms of taking more initiative (interestingly enough I’d often interpret people’s behavior as them not being inviting toward me, and here it is valid to ask whether and how I am creating/manifesting this in my life) – but I hadn’t yet asked myself Why.

So, upon looking at the Why, I found an interesting thing: I was in fact waiting for the others to ‘define’ their relationship toward me /their ‘who I am’ BEFORE I decide who I am and what my relationship to them is.
So I gave ‘them’ the power to define ‘me’ and I accepted and allowed my reactions to determine my relationship to them. And so often I found myself ‘standing alone’ or feeling ‘left out’.
Within this it is clear – I have not be free. I had made myself subject to my own thoughts about how other people see me, how they perceive me, how they are toward me, and tried to form/adapt myself and my behavior to fit what I was perceiving, my perception however already being veiled by layers of patterns within my mind in relation to ‘me and other people’ that I had developed throughout my life.

It’s always been a difficult point for me – ‘other people’. Kinda weird. In the midst of other people I always felt like wtf-am-I-doing-here. I would observe how people treat each other as a child, and I would feel kinda lost in terms of trying to understand the ‘rules of the game’.

You tell yourself I’m not gonna play this game, I’m out, but you don’t yet realize that the whole world is part of ‘the game’ and you can’t just step out of it, and you can’t just change the rules without changing the Whole – the whole that is you, a reflection of you, an accumulation of you, of all the you’s, perhaps humanity used to be called you-manity and we were you-men lol
But seriously, what I mean is – you don’t realize that your own behavior / reaction, rebellion even, is part of the very same game.
So this system I was looking at now within myself is evidently not supporting me/life. Because this behavior does not allow me to unconditionally express ME, to unconditionally Be Here and Look and make decisions.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to use other people to make choices/decisions in life.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to wait for others to determine conditions before I position myself, to wait for others to respond to who and how I am before I even decide who and how I am. Within this I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to make myself subject to the world/the others to shape me, instead of me determining my standing, my Who I Am.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed within myself – from childhood – the belief that “I don’t know how to be in this world”. I forgive myself thus that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to within my mind make this world ‘more than’ and make me inferior, where I’d be too afraid to look at the world as is and make a decision as to who I am and how I am going live here, how I am going to walk my life.
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to take directive, to take self-responsibility, to take the lead in my relationships with other people.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear other people.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself within my mind make ‘other people’ ‘more than’ me and place myself as ‘inferior’, so much so that I’ve given away my power/responsibility to ‘other people’ to determine who and how I am.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear that other people influence my life/conditions, and instead of taking self-responsibility in determining/directing my life/conditions I had stepped back in my life and avoided other people, just to ‘feel like’ I am free from other people’s influences, however within my mind and the decisions and choices I was faced with – I’d still use my mind’s mental images of other people to form my choices/decisions around, simply because I was looking at myself through the eyes of others – projections of my own accepted self-definitions of course.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear to stand alone.
I forgive myself that I haven’t allowed myself to see, realize and understand what Stand Alone practically means. It doesn’t mean to avoid other people, it doesn’t mean to isolate oneself or try to it all by oneself; To Stand Alone simply means that I alone carry the responsibility for myself, my life, my choices, my decisions, my Who I am and How I Live and co-exist. We stand alone, yet we walk together. We support each other in our processes, but no one can make the decision to Stand-Up for you, no other can stand-up in your stead. That’s why it’s about SELF-Responsibility – SELF-Honesty, SELF-Forgiveness, SELF-Correction.

An interesting point around Self-Forgiveness, is that the word forgiveness is given more weight than the word self.
The word forgiveness from a system perspective is charged with the words sin, badness, guilt, inferiority, shame. Why we don’t see is how self-forgiveness is about SELF GIVING oneself the chance to see, realize and understand what self has created and to release the guilt, shame and wrongness and correct oneself – change. So, self-forgiveness is about taking the self-responsibility to ‘right’ oneself, from a starting-point of oneness and equality as what’s best for all. I mean if god existed, that would be god’s nature: oneness and equality as best for all.

A similar interesting point can be observed with the words Stand Alone:
the word alone is given more weight than the word stand, and thus there tends to be an emotional reaction rather than the understanding of what it means to Stand-Up and Stand.
In terms of redefining/aligning the words, one can even look at the word Alone as All-One, and one can live it as such. In my example here All-One can be lived in the taking of full responsibility for the choices and decisions I make = All of me as One is Here in awareness as I make this decision or choice and I take responsibility as I Stand Here Alone to make this decision.

And I mean, in full awareness All parts of self would be considered equally as One – wouldn’t from there emerge an expression of living potential, an expression of Standing and being able to see things for what they are, within self to begin with, and with others, to speak and act from the depths of one’s beingness without inner conflict, in insight and understanding of oneself and one’s world.
One can essentially look at this word – Alone / All-One – to mean INTEGRITY.

Thus, integrity within making decisions, integrity within making choices, integrity within determining and directing who I am and how I am –
in Self-Responsibility which means that no ‘other’ is to blame, no ‘other’ can be held responsible. I am the cause, thus all effect can be traced back to the cause, me, as the source, the origin.
I take this responsibility, I accept this responsibility, I embrace this responsibility, and I commit myself to Live this responsibility from the small to the big, and to expand my creative power by expanding my responsibility in life, in this world.

...I would suggest – having a look at when you are making decisions – how much of it you are making based on having ‘back doors’ and others to blame – where you aren’t taking full responsibility for decisions that You make for You, Your life, your future.Because we tend to get lost sometimes, in our relationships with other people…My life could’ve turned out so much differently, if I just wasn’t afraid to stand by myself – to look at Me and My life independently –
first independently and then within the interdependence or interconnectedness. I went in reverse and first defined myself and my life through others (the interdependence or interconnectedness) and from there defined myself and my individual life.So often in our lives we do eventually find ourselves alone – because there’s no way that you can predict what’s going to happen to the people in your life, how the relationships will change, will evolve, or separate, or progress, or regress, so –
It becomes a lot more challenging or difficult within your life to keep on having your decisions be dependent on others – and that will cause you to have to constantly and continuously adapt to other people and their lives – instead of you standing on your own two feet.

Stand Alone = Stand on My Own Two Feet
which also entails full responsibility for my decisions and choices = for myself and my life

Here we can see how Responsibility is in fact Power – and it is LIBERATING to be able to take full responsibility for the decisions that I make in relation to Who I Am and the Life that I’m gonna walk.

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Day 509 | Lack & Luck – Humanity, Reality Check

I am looking here at Perceptual Lack & Luck VS Physical Reality and in my last post I mentioned the polarity of Lack and Luck - and looking again at my past self-definition patterns, I see that I had perceived myself within the Lack-polarity while looking at others in comparison and thus within a definition of Luck; within this, separating myself from Self Responsibility and making myself/my life subject to Lack or Luck, as if I had no say within that whatsoever.
In looking at Lack and Luck directly, without interpretation and emotional attachments, we can see that perceptual Lack is self-created and Luck does not exist because in reality we have to create the change ourselves.

Consequences, results, outcomes are always an accumulation of points. When one is creating ‘Luck’ the consequence is of a pleasant nature – but it’s still a point of self creation.
Luck is just an 'end result' that others 'see' or that one will 'experience' for oneself. Though there are a lot of factors that come into play , a lot of preparation that goes into the 'one event' that everyone now calls 'Luck' or 'lucky' –
While all the while 'Luck' is a self creation point: Things are continuously happening where one is preparing oneself to 'walk' into the consequential outflows of one’s creation, and if it is seen to be a 'cool' or 'positive' creation, it is called 'Luck', while if it is seen to be a negative creation then the person is called 'unlucky'.

An interesting equation that I’m looking at is:
LACK must exist for Greed to exist;
LUCK must exist to justify Greed.

I mean if man is truly the ‘higher species’ – shouldn’t man take it in his hands to ensure LIFE and not leave in the hands of luck? Can’t we all see that there is enough of everything for all in this world? Lack need not exist. Unfortunately though, our evolution has been the evolution of self-interest, greed has been the driving force, separation, disenfranchisement and exploitation has been the cause of those in power. The effects are everywhere – this is Our Truth, Humanity.

In self-honesty and common sense, just by following cause and effect and studying the history of mankind (the truth of which is more and more exposed through the internet) one can see that one is always self-responsible. I mean, granted, when we are small and defenseless things happen to us that we cannot control or change or direct, things that we may not even understand or be able to place. Everyone is able to say look, this is my story, this and that happened to me when I was a child and that is why I am who I am and how I am. However, if we now accept that we are no longer the child that has no understanding and no tools to deal with reality and make informed decisions, we have to see that it is our responsibility to determine what we will do with the outflows/results/consequences of our existence and most importantly: how we will prevent such outflows/results/consequences to repeat in the future – on other words, how we will change ourselves and the conditions in our environment to produce a LIFE that is worth living.

Obviously, it is much easier to say this or that is responsible for who and how I am. It is easier to keep repeating that which we know rather than establishing and manifesting new ways, new paradigms, new living examples, based on real living principles.
What we as humanity tend to disregard and not consider in the smallest of our decisions is how the PRESENT is always accumulates into the future. And if the Present is lived out from the past, and if the past is not seen for what it is, is not investigated, understood and forgiven/healed/corrected, then we’ll only be repeating the patterns, habits, and cycles of the past, always blaming it all on something or someone else and never taking that absolute responsibility; never really evolving but only mutating into more subtle ways of manipulation, separation, and (self-)deceit.

Deceit – interesting word, it sounds like de-seat;
thus self-deceit: removing self from the ‘driver’s seat’, removing self from being on its life’s thrONE as directive authority, and allowing consciousness systems to take the lead instead –
consciousness systems that are rooted in separation and fear and ‘support’ the suppression of LIFE rather than its growth, expansion and freedom of expression.

Our consciousness systems function on the value-systems and equations dictated and imprinted by the world systems out there; then again, the world systems out there were imprinted and created by the value-systems and equations of 'human nature'. One of the biggest frauds in the history of mankind is the propagated belief that "somehow 'human nature' is 'human nature' - it cannot change". All the while the big brothers know better and use that knowledge for their own profit while keeping it away from the people.

It’s time to stop pointing fingers and take responsibility for our reality, from ourselves, from the small to the big – Get together as HUMANITY and make a difference.

If I were to be asked to write a list of 'ten commandments' for the present day, one thing I'd definitely include is: 

I suggest investigating the Equal Life Foundation’s proposal of a Guaranteed Living Income System. This proposal suggests a groundbreaking change in political paradigms that doesn’t ‘take sides’ but instead presents a completely new approach to solving the problems we are currently facing in this world.

Also, educate yourself here:

The Ultimate History Lesson:


The Century of the Self


The Trap

The Power Principle

Human Resources: Social Engineering in the 20th Century

The Story of Your Enslavement

Blind Spot

Inequality for all documentary:

The Four Horsemen:

On Advertisement and the end of the world:

Third World America – Chris Hedges

Donnerstag, 1. Mai 2014

Day 508 | On Lack & Luck and a Skewed Value-System

Continuing from
Day 507 | Walking Out of the Polarity – Enough!

So I had explained how I was stuck in the polarity energetics of omg I am not enough / it is not enough and the experience of lack and inferiority and on the other side the yearning and trying to be ‘more than’ that; and then the idea of I am enough emerged as a mental/consciousness attempt toward ‘self-acceptance’ or ‘self-worth’, yet it was nothing but a toned-down belief of positive-polarity which is the ego trying to ‘feel good’ or ‘feel better’ about its self-image, trying to fight those negative-polarity experience of lack and the idea of ‘I am not good enough’.
The supposed solution in the words ‘I am enough’ shows rather a limitation like the humble contentment of someone that accepts their inferiority. Like having a voice in your head telling “it’s okay, you are a good person” or “it’s okay, I love you just the way you are” or something like that, and if you are attentive you will taste the bitterness of self-pity within such words.

It’s quite interesting that we can see a similar pattern if we look at the world system and its organizations – take the example of charities or religions, where supposedly good is done and poor people are helped, while the mere existence of charity presupposes a system where it is ‘normal’ that there is not ‘enough’ for all, and that most have ‘less than enough’ while some have ‘more than enough’. But you know, we do charity, we are good people, it’s okay, nothing much we can do really, it’s just how the world is, poor people, we are sending you love energy…

Looking at the two polarity opposites that my definition of ENOUGH was trapped in:

The one dimension of the word ‘enough’ defined in the negative polarity as ‘I am not enough’ also masks the question 'What am I missing' – which by accepting (the statement “I am missing something”) I create this ‘yearning’.
…This is the 'yearn' to move oneself to the expectations that self had created and/or accepted for and as oneself. But where do such expectations come from? Where and how are the ‘values’ defined that form our consciousness and create our experiences?
Obviously I’ll be investigating and looking at ‘my expectations’ and ‘my desires’ for myself, to see where they come from and which of these expectations are relevant - which expectations can actually be lived - and which of these expectations requires to be put to rest.

The opposite dimension of 'being enough' as ‘self-acceptance’ – which is an attempt to ‘fill the void’ with something positive – creates a fake ‘contentment’ within limitation, because here 'being enough' is supposed to make oneself 'feel better' - But it has the starting point of being 'less than', and thus here the implied acceptance of ‘not being enough’.

Solution –
Instead of taking this route and defining oneself in the 'negative' (because 'being enough' is a comparison to something that is 'more than' - thus 'being enough' is a form of 'at least'/smallest) – so instead of defining oneself against a negative/small point, why not go directly and look at what it is that self would like to express - find the word - integrate the word - and live it.

I am seeing that I’ll have to look at the word ‘contentment’ as well to find a constructive definition that will not limit me and within which I can live true contentment within myself. I can already see an interesting path to take here, as I see the word content which is like the contents, which means that contentment comes from the contents one puts in, and thus in realizing and living my self-responsibility as to what contents I accept and allow to exist within me and be lived through and as Who I Am, I realize that contentment is when I live in a way that I ‘fulfill’ myself as in living self-response-ability – to be the best one can be/to give it one’s all, in every moment, wouldn’t that be true contentment for anyone?

I will be looking more into Living Words, as now I can see clearly how the belief/idea of I am enough is in itself a limitation – there is always aspects and dimensions of ourselves and our lives that we can improve, explore, expand – and through accepting such idea and making it into a belief I’d only be limiting myself.
What I came to see and realize through this investigation of my relationship to the word ‘enough’ is that the definition of ‘enough’ as we know it/as we’ve defined it exists within the implication of a system of LACK – a system of polarity that is ‘given’, as if there were no other way.

(have a look at the interesting play with sound in the words LACK and LUCK, and how they exist in our consciousness as the two sides of the same coin – this is the system we have accepted, within and without)

Within the process of looking at the Words we Live – our Living Words – and then reevaluating and redefining them / redefining what and how we live:
It’s very interesting to start investigating the workings of energy as polarity, because what we find is that this system of polarity exists within everything that the human consciousness creates – within and without – and WE are the ones constantly (re-)creating it.
Understanding cause and effect, understanding the How of the systems, enables us to see the How of the change that is possible and what it will take to get there.

In a system of equality and oneness – which implies that within the oneness of life each part of that oneness is in fact regarded and interacted-with as equal part of it, as life – there would be no issue with ‘enough’ or ‘not enough’.

The principle/value of ‘oneness and equality’ makes the word ‘enough’ irrelevant in the comparative context within which we know it and use it today. There would be no other meaning/value to the word ‘enough’ other than to say something like "this is enough, no more".

This system/principle/value of ‘oneness and equality’ can only begin with and within self - there is unfortunately no other way to create a world of oneness and equality where LIFE is the value and all life is free, because our world is always a reflection of ourselves, Humanity is a reflection of human nature; but human nature is programmable, unfortunately this fact has thus far only been used to abuse, manipulate and exploit, but not yet for self-empowerment in self-responsibility.

Time for CHANGE!

Thanks for the ART - Featuring RozelleDeLange and MatterFreeMan

Check out the Desteni I Process Lite – FREE course that will assist humanity to end the disaster of a dysfunctional consciousness. 

You may be interested in the daily process blogs that people from around the world share, check it out:

Join us in the Journey to Life !

*To share perspectives and ask questions visit the Forum

*For support and participation see the desteniIprocess

MUST-READ on Life and Creation:

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Day 507 | Walking Out of the Polarity – Enough!

What I’m realizing is that once you have lived one polarity of a word/expression, the habit is to go to the other extreme of the polarity, so as to just 'get out of' the negative living for instance. But once you have gone to the opposite polarity living and expressed it, you find that it was just again another polarity; and as such - you will start to 'tone' down the two polarities - until self is able to see the neutral point within it.
The neutral point within any word redefined is when you have found the expression of what this word means as a physical expression - Thus mot making it more or less than what it is as a physical expression of itself
The neutral point is the point of stating it directly.

For instance with the word ENOUGH:
The definition that I am looking for in the process of purifying the word from its energetic attachments I had created/accepted about it - is the definition that describes the expression of the word.

In speaking the word ENOUGH the expression I Hear and See is:
For example if you're getting your glass filled at some point you say thanks that's enough.
It means 'full' / can't take anymore

That’s it. Simple.
The solution is always a multiple times simpler than the problem.

Another thing I learned is that: 
The mind will try and 'fix' the problem - by giving it something that the mind thinks will help it.
This is not how things work –
<<You are not able to 'fix' things - You are only able to direct things so as to create what you are the master creator of.

Thus - Go back to the source – look and see for yourself what you have accepted and allowed - and then direct the points as to how you want to create your reality.>>

>>The concept "I am enough" is trying to 'fill the void' and the 'void' is created by all the things that everybody has for my entire life told me of who I should be / how I should live / what is the correct way of living / what everybody thinks the right way of living is / etc.
And if I do not meet up to these expectations (expectations that self had made one’s own) - Then the 'void' comes lurking - Making statements of / creating feelings of ‘not being enough’ - to which the mind will then respond: Hey look at me - I can take this moment under my blankets and 'feel enough'! But this is all just a cover for the already accepted expectations of self.
To go to source means that self investigates these expectations - and one by one decide what it is that self would like to live or is able to live - and then creating these points for oneself<<

An interesting outflow/manifestation/consequence that I can see within all this is also: how me allowing myself to be trapped within emotional/energetic/value experiences of ‘not enough’ and ‘must get/be enough’, trying to ‘find’ value while I was separating myself from self-worth and real self-acceptance as in: the power and will to decide, state, and enact as in express the actual physical meaning of the word Enough – making choices in life that will support me, instead of indulging in patterns and habits as attempts to ‘fulfill’ this ‘desire’;
And thus what I can see is how my being trapped in an emotional bipolar state as value-system (balancing on the tip of the pyramid of a mental idea of ‘value’/’worth’ that is skewed, as it is based on the consciousness system that rules this world within and without) kept me from finding stability within myself, as myself, in self-worth and value of life; 
And because I was 'lost' in mental/energetic polarity definitions of the word 'enough', I wasn't living the actual definition/expression of ENOUGH - and I wasn't stopping the 'search for...' that which would 'fulfill me' and make me 'enough' but instead trying to 'find' 'fulfillment' in separation from myself. 

I had robbed myself of the power to be the one who gives myself the value as worthy of life, in life, by deciding/living Who I Am in awareness in all my relationships and relations, and not allowing myself for example to participate where there is no respect and no regard for life for real.

So here I realize I have to look at ‘my expectations’ and ‘my desires’, that which I have defined as ‘more’ or as ‘goal’ or as something I must be before I can accept myself and allow myself to live. Wherein, I have used points and people in life to try and get/find acceptance or validation or value, but actually I was seeking to validate the positive and negative polarity ideas I held about myself and my reality. I mean, it’s crazy if you really look at it, we adopt and ‘inherit’ so many formats of thought and emotion, we have issues with value/acceptance/validation, we develop expectations that are not even our own, and we give everything and everyone around us the power to influence and define us - whether that is through positive or negative definitions and relationships. Parents play a major role here, and it is from parents that a revolution and evolution of what we call ‘human nature’ may emerge, an actual evolution that comes from e-value-ation and understanding, from will power and creative response-ability.

So obviously I'll be investigating my expectations, because for self to 'feel less than' there must be in the mind some opposite-polarity projections of me as 'more than' or at least as 'enough' - expectations towards self. Time for some reality check.

…to be continued

Thanks for the ART - featuring Kelly Posey

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