Samstag, 30. Mai 2015

551 | Self-Empowerment or Disempowerment - A Moment's Decision

Continuing from
 (please read for context)

…So after that sleepless night I got ready for work early in the morning and went to take the train to my working place, when I started feeling quite weak. There was also a strike going on and because some of the public transportation was taking part in the strike, the remaining ones were so full that not everyone could take the next bus or tram but had to wait for the next or the next or the next…
Realizing how exhausted I had made myself, especially due to participating in an emotional reaction in my mind –which obviously had consequences for my physical body’s condition– I decided to cash in the consequence and go back home, rest or maybe try and get some sleep after all.

I couldn’t get any sleep, but after resting a bit, I looked again at what had taken place since last night – and I saw how I had in fact in one single moment made the decision to follow the thoughts that were coming up –
I WANTED to think, I WANTED to 'sort this out NOW' – I wanted to keep on thinking about it until it would be clear … though really, most of us do have the knowledge, through experience, about how things only get worse/more confusing when we only ‘think about’ them on our mind, instead of for instance either writing it out and giving it direction toward a solution OR talking about it with another person also from the starting point of understanding the problem to see the solution.

It was also in one single moment that I had made the decision in my mind that: I won't be able to sleep. I can't sleep. I must sort this out now. I continued thinking myself to exhaustion, and did not get anywhere – obviously.

Have you ever noticed how our thinking tends to move in cycles? We recycle the same thoughts over and over again – but real solutions do not come out of such thinking processes.
So here I was, sitting on my couch the morning after this sleepless night, realizing it was all indeed a moment's decision, in unawareness...

For a moment now, upon seeing this, I was like…Shit, I ruined my night, I ruined my day - there is so much work waiting for me at work, and I've fucked it up.

But I truly wanted to get things done. I had made the decision for myself that I’d like to finish all my projects at work before I start my holidays. I started checking my workplace emails and the work load was getting bigger and bigger, and I saw myself getting more and more stressed.
I really wanted my projects directive to be successful and I wanted to get the job well done, and so upon realizing that I was going into stress about it, I was like…OK, let me NOT go into this stress, let me see how to make the best out of this situation.

And in one moment, as I was looking into finding the best way to move forward with this, I "had an idea" = I saw the solution and I made the decision:
I will take this ONE point (the projects requiring my direction at my Job) and I will dedicate my day to this ONE point and I will make out of it a practice point –
I saw it as a great opportunity to practice 'project management', because here I was required to manage several projects at the same time.
So I decided that I am able to prepare the steps, take the time to prepare the timeline of what needs to be done for each project, see what I can already do/manage now, from home, and so prepare the way for the next day where I can go to work and get everything done, being clear about the steps that I need to take to complete each project.

Here, in ONE moment, with ONE single decision, ONE simple shift within myself – I turned from disempowerment where I felt overwhelmed and stressed with the volume of work to be done, to SELF-EMPOWERMENT where I decided to turn this into a fun practice that will benefit all and will support me in making the best out of the moment and in fact the best out of this day.
And so I turned the stress and anxiety into a cool practice point for myself in that moment, and it was amazing how my entire ‘mood’ and self-experience changed in ONE go. I indeed had a good time preparing everything as I had decided that I would, and next day I went to work with one A4 paper for each project, all steps written out, I could follow through and manage everything within exactly the time I had available.

I am sharing all this to show how we indeed have the CHOICE – one choice in every moment: to either go into disempowerment – where we make something or someone or a situation ‘more than’ self here; or self-empowerment – where we take self-responsibility and pull off the directive to make the BEST out of a moment, giving the BEST of ourselves.
To do this, we must practice stopping the mind, meaning: stopping the automated thought- and experience-patterns; and instead taking directive and truly making the BEST choices at any given moment. To do that, we need to practice REAL-TIME self awareness and take responsibility for our creations.

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