In this blog post I'd like to elaborate on a point that I shared perspective on, on a social platform. I only placed the first part as a comment, but I continued writing/expanding on the points, which I'd like to share here, specifically within the Desteni context of self-support in oneness and equality as life.
The following question was placed:
How do I get over my bad habit of procrastinating?
"I have this terrible habit of procrastinating things which I don't enjoy or which involve even a little bit of stress. I usually tend to look the other way and live in the moment. I'm in my early 20s and have joined my first job recently. I thought this would be over as I graduated, but apparently old habits die hard.
I've noticed that this often hurts my productivity. I really want to make this time of my life count."
My perspective:
Hi,
what I do is first of all to identify the thoughts / back-chatting in the mind that 'justifies' the procrastination, as that is the mechanism of self-sabotage that our conditioned consciousness applies to keep the You that is able to expand under its control, where, one then remains in a ‘comfort zone’ where there is a perceived "safety" or "easiness" or whatever the 'experience' is that you conditioned/programmed yourself to place value into.
Because, that You that is able and willing/wishing to stand and expand and grow and really live, free from definition / limitation, was already able to See through looking at reality in common sense that this habit/pattern is keeping you back, keeping you limited, keeping you controlled. And you find yourself realizing that you should be able to be the directive principle in your life/your self-application, but somehow this one particular point seems to have 'power' over you.
Here what I realized is that: You are the one giving it the power. And there's particular specific thoughts that come up in those moments 'automatically', and one tends to follow them and believe them in that moment, and through that acceptance you are then allowing the point to have power over you. We literally give our directive power away to the conditioned mind/consciousness that we have become.
So the solution in facing this/such point: it is to stand equal to it, as it, and ask oneself / look to see: how am I creating this point / this experience / this pattern, what thoughts / internal conversations am I entertaining / following, what emotional moods am I addicted to, what have I placed value in.
Because upon looking again in self-honesty and practical common sense, you See that: that which is of actual value ( =You moving yourself effectively in a self-supportive / life-supportive way within your practical reality) is being suppressed / ignored / sabotaged.
So in those moments where you then see yourself going to follow those thoughts / internal conversations that seem to ‘justify’ procrastination or any kind of self-sabotage, you take a breath and bring yourself back to here and now, you stand-up within yourself and say No. I will direct myself this way, that way, I make the decision to take directive principle and live self-responsibility in this/that way as I see that this is supportive of me as life, and I see that I don’t want to create regret or self-doubt or self-sabotage.
It need not be an inner struggle. The fact that inner struggle / inner conflict manifests as such implies that You are the only one that is able to direct it – because it’s Within You. So it’s not to fight it, fear it, judge it; but to acknowledge it as self, yet at the same time seeing who self really is / can be – actualized, self-determined.
So it's to realize that such 'inner conflict' indicates a separation of self within self – and thus the solution is to 'bring self back together', as one, here, bring all of self equally here as one, and take responsibility, Live responsibility as an expression of oneself.
Such 'inner conflict' is sometimes necessary from the perspective that it reveals to you / it pushes you to see and face: the separation of self within self, and consequently within self's world – and within that is an opportunity to see and realize:
I am the only one within me, only I can stop self-sabotage, only I can stop self-dishonesty. So let me look into how the self-sabotage works. How have I programmed myself? What automatic patterns am I playing out / re-cycling? How am I manipulating myself in/through/as the mind? Because only I can make a difference in my life, my experience, and consequently my world; by changing my self-application and my relationship with/within myself.
Once such realization emerge, 'inner conflict' becomes unnecessary from the perspective that, it would only be further self-sabotage, further submission to the conditioned mind system. Because one has seen and realized that the common-sense step would be to take a breath and integrate the realization physically: live it /apply it in one’s actual reality.
So it is to stand-up within oneself, breathe, forgive oneself the separation, accept that one is here and thus that one's responsibility is here, and take back the power to live/be the directive principle of who/how one is in every moment here, in the context of a self-commitment to self-support / life-support –
and that implies to not accept or allow 'less than' what is best for self / what is best for life.
That would be self-responsibility for life, as life, as who one really is.
Then one is able to live in self-gratitude – because you know, you are not accepting or allowing anything less from yourself than who you really are as life, in oneness and equality with yourself – thus here emerge actual equilibrium based in self-honesty. THAT is a solid, sound foundation / starting-point for whatever one decides to apply / express / contribute in this world, in the actuality of one's reality.
That is the living principle of oneness and equality as life.
Based on this principle one can approach any/all aspects/points in one’s life and look at: Where am I giving my power away and how? What automatisms am I following? What do my thoughts, emotional reactions, beliefs, moods, reveal about/of me? How have I created/conditioned myself to be who/how I am today? Where do my reactions come from? What undealt-with issues are there in my life /within myself? What am I suppressing, denying, resisting? What am I protecting / holding onto / addicted to? What am I trying to prove? Where are my ‘comfort zones’? Why am I hiding? Why am I avoiding responsibility for myself / life? What do I actually really care for?
Within that, the realization may emerge that: what is really best for me is best for all – and what is best for all is best for me equally.
You’ve already realized/acknowledged, that we create consequences – the way we live creates consequences – in our lives, our reality, our world; and that to live only in the moment without consideration of consequences, often leads to regret – and regret is not a nice thing to live with.
But we can live every moment in such a way that we do not create consequences, that we instead create an accumulation of a way of life and interaction, an accumulation of a self-application and practical living that is of life-support, thus creating outflows that are of support, of dignity, self-honesty, self-respect.
We can BE HERE in every moment, in self-awareness, self-responsibility, self-direction.
This reality is one of time-space, thus of consequential outflow, of accumulation – our creation is formed through the accumulation of our application, our consistency, our patterns.
Now the question is – do the patterns of our existence in fact support life? Or do they support the mental constructs of mentalities ‘educated’ through ‘values’ that often disregard the actual value of ourselves as life – and consequently disregard life as that which we all have in common, as one, as equals of life.
So it’s worth investigating: Do we move ourselves or are we moved by conditioned perceptions and mental constructs? How do such conditioned constructs work? How can I take back the power and directive authority that I abdicate to automatisms?
For support and assistance with that there is the free online Desteni I Process lite course.
See also my previous Blog post:
262: Desteni ReSearch & the Actuality of Reality
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